Through feeling, not thinking
We often do things with no explanation. but then, are we supposed to have one? most of life that happens is without any explanation, leaving us shocked, moved or disoriented from that moment on to, perhaps, for the rest of our lives. so why are we supposed to put into words whatever interpretation or clarification that makes sense to us, for our every little action while everything else around us seems to be the other way?
to define is to limit — Oscar Wilde.
it really is. we define our relationships, conversations, phenomenas, moments, utterances, in whatever ways or labels that seem practical to us, looking for sensible definitions from here and there. why? when nothing in life seeks practicality, why do we seem to limit ourselves with those sensible ‘truths’? what is it that always takes us towards logic? where this urge to make sense of everything comes from? why can’t we accept that we simply can’t make sense of everything? except our emotions. what we feel inside our deepest of beings, those unaltered instances. abrupt responses. unedited moments. genuine embraces. kindhearted compliments. what stops us from following them? why do we let that fear of being brought back to reality, unannounced, keep ourselves back from encountering probably the most beautiful and real of experiences?
instead of this prisoned race after rationality, reason and logic behind everything, why dont we find a common peaceful ground amongst our raw beautiful emotions, those random bursts of energy, inner reflexes of simplicity and kindness and create our home there? in the true essence of ourselves. I think we are at our happiest in those moments of extreme emotional rawness, because happiness is always found somewhere we aren’t looking for, right? hidden behind most of the ignored instances of life? We have looked for happiness everywhere, maybe this is it. if only we have the courage to let go of the compass in our minds that always seems to point towards logic, apparently sensible ‘truths’, taking us farther from the actual reality that lies inside us. within our hearts, not minds. through feeling, not thinking.
I am tired. I really want to stop searching for it in worldly terms, running after definitions that my mind seems to give, and find solace and true consolation in that inner voice, creating my home inside those dreams and continuing in the hopes of never being hit so hard to be woken up. Even if you wake up, that fulfilling feeling of waking up from an amazing dream would still be worth the leap of faith.
